Why Should a Woman Have to Suffer to Deserve Bodily Autonomy?

By Giana Jarrah | Biomedical Engineer, Women's Health Educator & Co-Founder of With Meraki Co.

There's something about the way we discuss abortion that I think deserves a much bigger conversation.

I keep seeing debates where people bring up increasingly horrific scenarios, hoping to find the one situation that will finally change someone's mind.

What if she was raped?

What if the pregnancy resulted from incest?

What if she's a child?

What if continuing the pregnancy could seriously threaten her life?

These are devastating circumstances, and they deserve serious attention and compassion.

But I've been thinking about the question underneath all of them:

Why does the conversation so often revolve around how much someone has suffered before their reproductive decisions are considered legitimate?

As a biomedical engineer and women's health educator, I believe we need to talk about bodily autonomy, medical ethics, and reproductive healthcare in a way that recognizes the complexity of pregnancy without reducing patients to their most traumatic experiences.

Why Do We Focus on the Most Extreme Circumstances?

When abortion comes up in public conversations, the discussion frequently turns to exceptions.

Rape. Incest. Medical emergencies. Pregnancies involving severe fetal conditions.

These situations are important because they raise urgent questions about healthcare access, medical decision-making, and the consequences of restrictive laws.

But they also reveal something about how we frame reproductive choice.

When we focus exclusively on the most extreme circumstances, we can unintentionally create a hierarchy of whose experiences deserve compassion.

A person experiencing a life-threatening pregnancy complication may receive sympathy, while someone facing an unintended pregnancy after contraceptive failure may be judged differently.

Someone who becomes pregnant through sexual violence may be viewed as more deserving of an exception than someone who simply does not want to continue a pregnancy.

The ethical questions surrounding abortion are deeply contested, and people hold different beliefs about fetal moral status and the responsibilities associated with pregnancy.

But regardless of those disagreements, a person's circumstances should never be reduced to a test of whether their suffering is sufficiently convincing.

Bodily Autonomy Is Bigger Than One Medical Procedure

Bodily autonomy is the principle that people should have meaningful control over decisions involving their own bodies.

In healthcare, this connects closely to informed consent.

Patients are generally entitled to understand the risks, benefits, and alternatives of medical interventions and to participate in decisions about their care.

Pregnancy makes these questions especially complex because it involves significant physiological changes and, for many people, competing ethical considerations concerning fetal life.

But pregnancy also directly affects the health and body of the person experiencing it.

It can influence cardiovascular function, metabolism, immune responses, mental health, and nearly every major organ system.

Even an uncomplicated pregnancy requires substantial physiological adaptation.

And pregnancy is not medically risk-free.

Recognizing these realities doesn't settle every ethical disagreement about abortion.

It does, however, help explain why decisions about continuing or ending a pregnancy carry such profound personal and medical significance.

Not Every Unintended Pregnancy Begins With a Tragedy

One of the realities that gets overlooked in abortion conversations is that unintended pregnancies happen under many different circumstances.

Contraception can fail.

People can experience changes in their health, relationships, finances, or family circumstances.

Someone may become pregnant while married.

Someone may become pregnant in a long-term relationship.

Someone may become pregnant after a casual sexual encounter.

And someone may face an unintended pregnancy despite taking steps to prevent one.

None of these experiences tells us everything about the person's life, health, or decision-making process.

I think it's important to move away from the assumption that reproductive healthcare decisions can be understood simply by examining whether someone behaved responsibly.

A pregnancy decision is not a complete reflection of someone's character.

Reproductive Choice Also Includes the Choice to Continue a Pregnancy

This is another part of the conversation that deserves attention.

Bodily autonomy isn't only about the decision to end a pregnancy.

It also includes the ability to make decisions about continuing a wanted pregnancy.

Throughout history, reproductive control has taken different forms, including coercive sterilization, pressure to terminate pregnancies, and restrictions on contraception and reproductive healthcare.

These practices raise serious concerns about informed consent and the power of institutions over individuals' reproductive lives.

A consistent commitment to reproductive autonomy should take reproductive coercion seriously, regardless of the direction it takes.

No one should be pressured into a pregnancy decision through threats, manipulation, or misinformation.

That includes people who want to continue their pregnancies and people who are considering abortion.

What Does Medical Science Tell Us About Abortion Safety?

One of the most important distinctions in reproductive health education is the difference between safe, evidence-based abortion care and unsafe abortion practices.

Abortion can be provided through medication or procedural methods, depending on gestational age, medical circumstances, available services, and patient preferences.

When provided using recommended methods and appropriate medical standards, abortion is generally very safe.

Unsafe abortion, however, can lead to serious complications, including hemorrhage, infection, and injury.

Historically, people have attempted to end pregnancies using dangerous substances and physical methods, often without reliable medical information or appropriate care.

Abortion existed long before modern reproductive medicine.

What modern medicine has done is develop safer, more effective approaches to abortion care.

This distinction matters because discussions about abortion policy also involve questions about healthcare systems, medical training, access to reliable information, and the prevention of avoidable harm.

Why Abortion Stigma Matters

Abortion stigma refers to negative social judgments associated with abortion and the people who seek or provide it.

It can show up in subtle ways.

Someone may feel unable to discuss a past abortion with friends or family.

They may worry about being judged by healthcare professionals.

They may feel pressured to explain their decision in terms that others will find acceptable.

Or they may avoid seeking information because they're afraid of how people will react.

Stigma can make an already personal medical experience feel isolating.

And it can affect people regardless of their ultimate pregnancy decision.

We should be able to discuss abortion honestly, including its medical realities and ethical complexities, without dehumanizing the people involved.

Can We Disagree Without Losing Compassion?

Abortion raises genuine moral and philosophical questions.

Some people believe fetal life deserves legal protection from conception or another early stage of development.

Others place greater emphasis on the pregnant person's bodily autonomy and the consequences of requiring someone to remain pregnant.

Still others hold positions that change depending on gestational age, medical circumstances, or competing ethical considerations.

These differences are not always easy to reconcile.

But respectful disagreement does not require dismissing someone's suffering or assuming the worst about their intentions.

A person can have deeply held religious convictions about abortion.

Another person can approach the issue through medical ethics, personal autonomy, or different moral beliefs.

Understanding these perspectives doesn't require pretending that every argument is identical or that the practical consequences of different policies are the same.

It means taking both the ethical questions and the people affected by them seriously.

We Need More Reproductive Health Education

As someone who has dedicated so much of my work to women's health education, I think there's an enormous need for better conversations about reproductive healthcare.

That means understanding how pregnancy affects the body.

It means knowing how contraception works, including its limitations.

It means recognizing the medical complications that can arise during pregnancy.

It means understanding what abortion care involves and why patients may face different medical circumstances.

And it means being able to discuss reproductive ethics without relying on misinformation or sensationalized examples.

Reproductive health education should give people the tools to understand their options, ask informed questions, and engage thoughtfully with complicated issues.

Because regardless of someone's beliefs about abortion, accurate medical information matters.

My Final Thoughts

I don't think we should need to hear the most traumatic story imaginable before we recognize that pregnancy decisions can be profoundly difficult.

Someone shouldn't have to publicly recount sexual violence, pregnancy loss, a medical emergency, or deeply personal circumstances just to be treated with dignity.

We can acknowledge that abortion involves serious ethical disagreements while also recognizing that the people at the center of those decisions deserve privacy, accurate healthcare information, and compassion.

And we can discuss reproductive rights without turning individual experiences into hypothetical scenarios for strangers to debate.

A person's humanity should never depend on how tragic their story sounds.

That's where I want more of our conversations to begin.

Less sensationalism.

More science.

More understanding.

And more respect for the people whose lives are directly affected by reproductive healthcare decisions.

Love,
Giana 💜

Biomedical Engineer, Women's Health Educator & Founder of With Meraki Co.